Long time, No See !

yes, my blog is saying this to me : )
I am not the orkut/facebook/twitter/blog type person but still a friend (reading my long emails) told me to blog and i followed his instruction. Couldn;t understand though that who you are writing for ? Do I know the audience ? Am i talking to sky ? and if i am, then my diary serves the purpose.
First you write and then what? you wait for comments?
If it is a discussion forum, it is stil understandable but my thoughts - who cares ?
anyway, thankfully, i am not like my friend. He almost thought he IS his blog so if i didn;t comment, it wud not make him feel nice. So then i shud comment to keep the friendship going ?
Aah...
today i also thought to talk to the sky : )
Dont have network of friends. Not even write this with my name/identity and didn;t want it so that people dont HAVE TO drop by.
Accidental drop bys will be real connections, what say ?
Cheers...

Cost of Progress ?

I/We shifted to Gurgaon (suburbs of Delhi) in 1989 when my father retired from his job in another state and returned to his native land.
It was a small town then, with majority of people going to Delhi for jobs. It was quite open and less polluted then.

Things started changing…in mid-1990s.

More people started moving out of Delhi because of its pollution and over crowdedness.
Gurgaon was developing then. Nice colonies were coming up and many Delhites sold their properties in places like Karol Bagh/Rajendra Nagar in huge amounts and bought big plots/kothis here in half the price.

With better commercial complexes in Gurgaon, companies started moving in. That reversed the traffic. So now people from Delhi and NCR region come to Gurgaon for jobs.

And then came the Call Centres and then Malls…
More job opportunities, more traffic, more noise, more people relocating to Gurgaon, more disparity between old and new Gurgaon, more robberies/chain snatching/bags snatching, more intolerance, more indifference, no compassion….

One can see accidents happening everyday while commuting to office. And everyone is so busy that no one stops to help. But if their own vehicle is scratched, they stop and then have all the time to fight right there, stopping the whole traffic.

Where has our basic sensibilities gone ? Are we not left with any humaneness ?

Can’t we spare a moment to reflect upon – what is it we want ultimately –
more money with less peace, with lesser time to impart our children sanskaars to enable them to be better humans/citizens, with no time and patience left to talk to our old parents…
OR may be lesser money with more peace, more time, more contentment, more patience, more love of our children, more blessings of our elders…

Time to ponder…

My kind of cinema

Saw “Blue Umbrella” this weekend.

A neat and clean movie.
A movie BY kids FOR the adults !
To show – to what extent we can go to get what we want – be it in Biniya’s (the little girl) case or in old man’s (Pankaj Kapoor) case.
And when we get what we wanted – what we actually have ? Pleasure or pain ? Pleasure in Biniya’s case and Pain in old man’s case.

Pankaj Kapoor is so effortless in any role he plays !
Hats off to him!

Music, photography/cinematography, direction – all very good.
Full Marks to Vishal Bhardwaj !

I like Himesh Reshamiya now !

Yes, I can see that somewhere I have started liking this guy Himesh Reshamiya, who I used to dislike so much for his loud and monotonous songs ! (and for his cap and his attitude also !)

Last season on Sa Re Ga Ma Pa, I just couldn’t stand him – the way he used to get hyper, the way he used to bring unnecessarily one participant’s love story, the way he used to force that boy to wear cap like him – it’s a different matter that Vineet couldn’t win the title and must have thought – “Achchhi topi pehnai himesh ne !”

But this season, he has improved. Appreciating participants genuinely. Not fighting with Co-judges unnecessarily and is giving full 10 with “bada Dil”.
Looks like – success has given contentment to him. Good !

And, yesterday again, at Koffee with Karan, he showed that he is not arrogant. He showed his niceness when he said “I want to win those people who don’t like me.”
I liked the attitude as I too believe in the same thing – winning people who don’t like me ! : )

Keep it up Himesh. I will go see your movie now : )

That Small Yellow Envelop....

This is a sequel to my earlier one titled "You have mail".
I miss that envelop now and hence comes this one...


"The Small Yellow Envelop"

I take another glance at that corner of the screen
No small yellow envelop - I eagerly wait for - is seen

where have all the people gone from my life
I try to be patient but no respite...

Know, they are busy with their lives..
Know, not everyone would remain forever in my life

but I still eagerly wait
for that small yellow envelop
and I still smile, whenever it comes
hoping it to be from a dear one

whether it is,
or it is not
I wont let the Hope die,
as thats what I have got

This Hope lets me go on...
and dream for better days
Friends make Life meaningful
in so many ways...

Life is better now....

Recently while reflecting as usual, I realised that 2 things have changed my life for better lately.
One is Accepting people as they are, and
Two is Forgiving others and yourself too!

Nothing new in those two things but I adopted them lately and saw the difference myself.

The irritation/annoyance I used to have with people (especially at home!) on so many things (not being as clean or systematic as I am, etc) has gone the moment I realised that I need to accept them as they are! Things have improved marginally. No annoyance so no repercussions! And Life is peaceful : ) Amen!

Same way, till I learnt to forgive people, I used to keep cribbing or having grudge even after a long time. Wasn’t gaining anything. Rather was loosing peace of mind and getting unnecessarily stressed. Now when I have learnt to forgive people (may not be instantly, may be to some in 3 days and to some in 3 weeks! ), I can smile to people even those who misbehaved/mistreated. And my smile fetches a smile back and makes them also feel comfortable ( I know my boss was feeling very guilty after shouting at me but couldn’t say sorry!).

Please note that I am not PREACHING anything here. Just sharing my experiences, in case anyone can be benefited – good!

Cheers!

What scares me most.... !

Death ? No... : ) (my profile intro tells that)

Lizards? Oh yes, I am scared of lizards since childhood!

Performing in public? Well.... like many others, used to be but thankfully not any more.

But what scares me most now is – “Loosing the purpose to live !”

Lately this emptiness in life led me to this question – “Why I am here?” After all, What is the purpose of having been given this human life which we say is the most superior kind? These questions are not the easy ones to find an answer quickly. They take the whole life time to realise -who I am? I am still wandering to find those answers for myself.

But meantime, the thought came out like this:-

So often I loose the purpose to live
What is Life? What I am to Give? (learnt that life is giving and not taking)

The day begins and the day ends
And Life goes on, without much plans..

Why I am here? What am I supposed to do?
Have I understood the meaning of Life?

It’s so easy to take things for granted,
Wasting time in things unwanted.

How precious life is, we realise it late
And then we blame everything to our fate!

Is that fate? Or is that the choices we made earlier in life
Which decide – whether we live or strife?


How's that ? : )

You have mail...

Emails came in my life in 1998. And life changed for better since then.
They brought so much excitement and joy and knowledge and fun in life.

Emails helped making friends with people across the world – people you haven’t seen and may be will never see!
Still they brought friends so close with quick communication that every “You have mail” brought a smile on face and brightness in eyes (at least to start with).
And I started liking that “Yellow Envelop” at the bottom corner of the screen so much so that it inspired me to write these lines :-

That small yellow envelop on my screen
Pops and says “you have mail”
It brings some excitement and some hope
And I smile… without fail.

Those very few moments
of excitement are great
And I wonder….
What would be in my fate!

Hoping it to be – a mail from a friend
I switch to the window, still with a smile
When it’s not, the smile goes
And I feel sad, for a while...

Another envelop… another hope…
Another smile…. And it goes : (

And when I see it finally
Coming from you
The smile broadens
And stays.

I like that yellow envelop appearing on my screen
I like the message “You have mail”
The days pass by… and the life goes on…
Whether a mail, or no mail !

Wed, 29th Oct 2003